What is even happening? Why do humans and their feelings have to be so complicated? Why can't everything just be clear-cut and upfront?
Gender Identity: I feel mostly like a man, partially non-binary or female, and a little bit non-binary or female. I sometimes experience a lack of gender or minimal connection to any gender identity. I have a strong masculine aspect to my gender identity. My gender experience fluctuates both in identity, shifting from one gender to another or to none, and in intensity, varying from full to partial gender feelings. My gender varies over time, sometimes feeling more aligned with one identity than another. I often feel a lack of gender where others typically experience a sense of identity. My gender is akin to a fluid version of being a man; while I may prefer to be seen and treated as a man, my gender can shift between various identities. It's fluid, yet always at least somewhat related to a (full) male. I feel sometimes feel half male and half another gender, embodying both aspects simultaneously. My gender identity aligns with femininity but exists outside the traditional gender binary, like it's there but hard to tell, like it's faded but still noticeable. I recognize and embrace all genders, shifting fluidly between those associated with masculinity, femininity, neutrality, and even genderlessness. I'm sort of a girl, but not quite. My gender feels dark, empty, and hollow.
Gamous: When my preferences for the number of partners change, it can vary between having no partners, one partner, or engaging with multiple partners. I am mainly not committed to anyone and have no desire for partners at all. This is like my default setting. I am perfectly happy being single the rest of my life. On other occasions, I have a super strong desire to date someoen, where we're both fully committed to each other, like soulmates. And I'm completely okay being in a polyamorous relationship, but it's not perfered. While I'm primarily inclined towards monogamous relationships, I'm also open to the idea of exploring polyamory.
Romantic Orientation: Romantic attraction occurs infrequently for me, fading into the background most of the time. I've had brief crushes and but faded away. My romantic attraction changes over time, but it always remains on the aro-spec. I enjoy romantic activities but don't feel a romantic desire for romantic relationships in the real world. The intensity of my romantic feelings can vary greatly over time. My romantic orientation is always accompanied by a strong feeling of dread or anxiety. Sometimes I feel romantic attraction and desire for relationships, but I tend to lose interest once I start dating someone. My romantic orientation is highly fluid. I'm someone who enjoys romantic concepts and fantasies but feels little to no desire for real-life romantic relationships or activities. I've experienced more romantic attraction to fictional characters than people irl. It's not always strong or frequent, more like fleeting moments. Sometimes my romantic attraction is infrequent or weak, and it swiftly dissipates upon rejection. I find myself attracted to people of all genders, although individual preferences and experiences definitely influence my attraction. I'm mainly attracted to men and women, but I'm still attracted to everyone. I often have difficulty discerning between platonic and romantic feelings, sometimes perceiving them as indistinguishable or occasionally confusing one for the other. I thought I had a crush on my best friend, but I just *really* wanted to be her friend, like a platonic soulmate. It's especially challenging when I experience romantic attraction only after knowing that the other person is romantically interested in me first.
Sexual Orientation: My attraction to different genders changes over time, but my attraction stays constant. It fluctuates between feeling asexual, allosexual, or hypersexual. I'm mostly attracted to men and women, but occasionally feel sexual attraction to non-binary other gendered people. My (all types) attraction to people can change from day to day, depending on factors like who I'm around, my gender identity, my environment, my mood, etc. I'm attracted to all genders but with varying intensity, where the intensity of attraction can change over time. I'm not consistently attracted to all genders; sometimes, I feel a sudden, temporary attraction to all genders. I typically don't feel sexual attraction, but occasionally experience brief, intense bursts of sexual attraction. I might feel repelled by most sexual acts or thoughts unless they're initiated by someone else. I occasionally feel attraction but generally lack active interest in pursuing relationships. I feel sexual attraction in my imagination and don't act on it in real life. I experience sexual attraction that I fulfill through self-stimulation, recognizing that I don't engage in sexual activities with others despite having a libido. I enjoy sexual content and fantasies, get aroused by them, but don't desire sexual relationships or actions with others. I enjoy sexual concepts and fantasies but feel little to no desire for real-life sexual relationships or activities. My sexual attraction is infrequent or weak. I'm attracted to all genders, where individual preferences and experiences may influence my attraction. I feel sexual desires but don't feel sexual attraction to others, feeling disconnected.
So does anyone know what any of this is? Sorry for the long post…
